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| 84 murders, 328 arsons, 2826
aggravated assaults, and 13081 thefts in 2001. we came prepared with
our bulletproof vests. oh, the city of oakland.
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| why waste time building
one of those pesky parking lots when you've got all this green?
it's a good thing i wasn't driving my
360 modena. :D
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| fellow residents of oakland
standing in front of what is
soon to become
the oracle center for science and environmental education. |
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| the commercials lure
unsuspecting customers in with images of vibrant, exotic
animals frolicking about. here, we observe the stone cold reality
of zoo life in the city of oakland. |
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| my faith in riding one
of these camels in 120 degree heat while traversing miles of sand
across the sinai desert is minimal. |
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| warm mass of flesh, coat
with multicolored fur, surround with plants and a rectangular
mesh of steel. |
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| the incessant flow of
screaming ragamuffins from the city of oakland have caused these
warthogs to become nocturnal. perhaps it is time for a
new strategy.
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| unfortunately, this is
only effective if people are actually able to read.
this
may not
always be the case. :D
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| a giraffe gnawing on
a hastily constructed bucket of twigs.
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| more of that. |
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| sandy, contemplating the
planting of a large number of acacia trees. |
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| a giraffe, making it easy
for me. |
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| cacti, intermixed
with steel pipes and an aging wooden fence, are hardly enough to fool
these camels into thinking they have a job to do.
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| off to the african village
we go . . . |
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like the much anticipated dilophosaurus in jurassic park, the lion was
also nowhere to be seen.
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| so we looked at pictures
instead. *growl!* just how do lions communicate? hmm . . .
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| succulent, defenseless
zebras!!! love, tiger. |
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| an elephant seriously
in need of a bath of botox injections.
ah, the risks of extreme sun exposure.
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| elephants: wear large
botox banners across their bodies. in return: a lifetime
supply of tree leaves, fruits, bark, branches, shrubs, and
grass.
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| elephants - small. sandy - tall.
she said, she liked, the ocean. she showed me a beach, gave me a peach
and pulled out the suntan lotion . . .
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| fresh zebra meat right
off the bone! *salivating* love, tiger. |
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| wood fired zebra pizza,
braised zebra with rosemary and thyme, grilled zebra burgers
with roquefort mayonnaise and barbecued red onions, ... the possibilities
are endless! |
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| camouflaged to perfection. |
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| a little animal
scurrying around in search of bits of sustenance.
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| a perfectly reasonable
form of transportation for cruising down shattuck on a hot summer
day. |
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| ball of herbage laced
with appropriate methamphetamines for maximum camel and zoo
patron enjoyment. |
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| as dr. alan grant would
say: "damn". no tiger. |
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| fancy sign for a non-existent
tiger. |
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| the elusive tiger waiting
for a herd of wounded, unsuspecting antelope to stroll by. |
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| #!/usr/bin/python. |
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| sandy avoiding the heat. |
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| sandy not avoiding the heat. |
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| ooooooh, the spirit of
life! and errr.. la la la, ... la la .. the spirit of life!!
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| wooty woot, the
hamadryas baboon! hoopty hoop! aiieeee, the urban influences
of the city of oakland strikes again. |
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| sun bear. |
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| sun bear eat meat. |
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| sun bear like meat. sun bear
really, really like meat. |
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| thanks bosack and kruger. |
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| wheeee! the view from above. |
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| camels, again. |
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| oakland people. |
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| wheeee! check out those shoes! :D |
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| lions, getting 93475% of their
daily recommended dosage of vitamin a. |
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| eating. |
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| resting. |
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| lions, on the return
route. |
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| protective rail preventing
us from plunging to our death. |
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| i think
gatorland should
install one of these.
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| warning: seriously dangerous
animals here! |
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| oakland person's interpretation:
great place for a nap. |
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| alligators, out.
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| sandy posing with a random,
sedated animal. |
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| sleeeeepy. so so sleeeeepy. |
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| interchangeable animals. |
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| a case of 40's later . . . |
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| "toooo weak to attack. so
so weeeeak. i guess i will just stare and salivate". |
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| disoriented and
scavenging various bits of grain off the warm ground. |
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| oblivious. |
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| random farm animal on a timeout.
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index
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